The following is my response to my children’s grandmother, when, 5 weeks after the fact, she calls to ask whether the children ever got their birthday and valentine’s gift that she sent in the mail.  Inwardly, I utter a big guilty maternal  oops.

Dear my lovely ex-mother-in-law,

OK,

the bottom line is that Ben did receive his gift a few days ago.  I know it is 5 weeks after you sent it and so you may be asking, (and it would be fair to do so)

What happened?! (you are invited to read the following out loud, rapidly, barely pausing for a breath)

Well, I got a note from the mail carrier saying that there was a package waiting at the post office a few blocks away for Ben and Abby.

I did not know what it was and wanted them to go or to go with me–which never happened because they are so very busy with their lives these days.

So, I procrastinated on getting it because I was hoping for the parental teaching opportunity to present itself, you know, showing them how to pick up a package from the post office, and the opportunity never came at a time when I, and they, and the post office were all available.

So, I finally went to pick it up on the last possible day, after the final warning came through the mail slot.  We need not forget that I did not know what the package was, or who it was from, because, had I known, I would have gone much much sooner.

So.

There. That is the story.

And then, the package was opened, and out tumbled the chocolate and the two 10 dollar bills, and the chocolate was gobbled up quickly, and the money was spent in the case of Ben, and put on Abby’s dresser,

and, luckily,

the puffy envelope rested, un-dealt-with, on the window sill in the computer room for another two weeks until Ben had the bright idea to look inside and low and behold, he found the card and cheque for his birthday!!! Yay! Mystery solved.

But, my lovely children have still not thanked their lovely Gran for their lovely gifts and that is the missing link here.

There. That is the story.

The end.  For my part that is.

Ben and Abby, you still have something left to do.

I love you all.